By now everyone is aware of the recent Toyota news surrounding sudden speedy stuck gas pedals that have been reported by owners. First let me make everyone aware that if you are piloting ANY vehicle that speeds away without your consent, throw the shifter into NEUTRAL and shut off the ignition. The brakes should still have some power left in them and you can also use the emergency brake to come safely to a stop.
If you simply turn the ignition off without going into neutral you risk a more dangerous situation with the wheels locking up and losing control of the vehicle. With that out of the way, let’s get back to the news…
Residents of Detroit have seen “countless Mustangs ripping down the streets at unsafe speeds”. They have witnessed this so often they have reported their observations to the police. Detroit police involved the mechanical engineers at Michigan State to further investigate.
Lead Engineer Albert Skinka reports, “We have intensely studied this phenomenon with rigorous lab testing and by riding shotgun with Mustangs we first observed speeding by. Furthermore we added depth to the study by interviewing nearly 500 local Mustang owners. We’ve come to the following conclusion…”
Let me digress for just a moment and point out that Albert’s last name means “ham” in Swedish. Not sure what relevance that has at this moment, but as soon as we find out, rest assured knowing Stang Pit will be first to break the news.
Skinka went on, “There appears to be no mechanical flaw with any of the Ford Mustang accelerators. It seems that Mustang owners simply cannot help but press the accelerator often, and as far down as possible given the situation and road conditions.” Albert has obviously never driven a ‘Stang. Poor fellow.
P.S. In researching this story, I found that the word bologna (pronounced baloney) is apparently spelled the same in nearly every language across the globe, except for Finnish, Hungarian, and Catalan. Though it may seem trivial, this information may be quite useful some day.